On Frogs
Posted By Lonesome Loser on January 21, 2009
You know that old adage that goes something like “if you dissect a frog in order to understand it better, it isn’t a frog anymore, just a bunch of lifeless pieces.” I believe this is the case with romantic love, as well. The whole is greater than the sum of its parts. This doesn’t mean we can’t or shouldn’t look at why we love certain people, or how we love certain people. But at some point all that analysis is beside the point, and only injures or takes the life out of the experience it had hoped to shed light on. Looking overly much on why you fall in love with a particular person has a way of negating your feelings, of “deconstructing” them, in the language of English majors. I’ve always disliked the deconstructionist perspective, finding it overly pessimistic, lacking in compassion, and sort of missing the bigger picture.
There are people with other viewpoints out there that would insist I am being overly romantic, that all people who believe there is something “magical” or intuitive about love are not realists and liable to have difficulty coping with life’s disappointments because of it. Well, maybe. But true romantic love seems to require an element of mystery or magic or transcendence, and unrequited love is no different. A would-be lover’s analysis of exactly what makes up the mystery of their love may relinquish pain by demystification, yet kill emotional spontaneity and passion by the same process.
(Sorry, comments closed just on this one post because of too much spam coming through it…please comment on other posts, though.)
Comments