Charlie Brown and the Little Red-Haired Girl

Lonesome Loser | July 30, 2010

This is perhaps one of the most well-known stories of unrequited love.  It’s helpful in terms of communicating the experience of unrequited love or limerence to others, as most everyone (at least in U.S. culture) is familiar with the story and we can all empathize with Charlie Brown’s longing, fear of not being good enough, [...]

“I Love You” — “What?!”

Lonesome Loser | March 30, 2010

So, someone has declared their undying love for you.  And you don’t feel the same.  How uncomfortable!  Someone saying they are in love with you when you don’t love them in return is an experience most of us wish we would never have.  However, the truth is that it is actually an experience that most [...]

The Definition is Yours

Lonesome Loser | December 24, 2009

I just want to argue for taking all this discussion, and every “expert” opinion on unrequited love (as well as romantic love in general) with several grains of salt.  Basically, deciding whether you are in love or not is your decision.  There is no surefire way to verify “for real” whether it’s love or not.  [...]

“Unrequited Love Isn’t Real”

Lonesome Loser | May 12, 2009

I’ve been surfing the net and finding there’s a lot of bad advice out there about unrequited love.  The superficial or manifest level of communication tends to go something like “Gee, that’s too bad.  It’s so painful.  This isn’t really love, it’s limerence.  It’s nothing to be ashamed of, but it is a place you [...]

How do you know when you are in love?

Lonesome Loser | April 21, 2009

Great question! Not an easy one to answer. I’m working on an online quiz for love vs. crush, but it’s still in development. Scientifically, there is no clear or universally accepted definition for being in love.  However, there is a universally observable phenomenon that is variously known as a crush, infatuation, being in love, romantic [...]

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Please feel free to contact me at LONESOME LOSER*, I'd love to hear from you. I will make every effort to answer each email.

*This moniker sounds considerably more pathetic than I actually feel, but I just couldn't resist the tongue-in-cheek description.