The Definition is Yours

Lonesome Loser | December 24, 2009

I just want to argue for taking all this discussion, and every “expert” opinion on unrequited love (as well as romantic love in general) with several grains of salt.  Basically, deciding whether you are in love or not is your decision.  There is no surefire way to verify “for real” whether it’s love or not.  [...]

Echoes

Lonesome Loser | November 28, 2009

Here’s a post for those of us who like questionnaires, charts, graphs, all the various accoutrements of science that make us feel things are more official. Briefly, attachment theory is a psychological theory of relationships that suggests our relationship styles with parental figures in early infancy predict our relationship styles as adults.  In other words, [...]

Rabbits or Rapture?

Lonesome Loser | September 23, 2009

Did you ever go to a magic show when you were younger?  You know the rabbit out of the hat trick?  The magician stands behind a table covered with a red cloth, an old-fashioned top hat is shown to be empty, then laid upside down on the table.  The magician waves his magic wand over [...]

“Unrequited Love Isn’t Real”

Lonesome Loser | May 12, 2009

I’ve been surfing the net and finding there’s a lot of bad advice out there about unrequited love.  The superficial or manifest level of communication tends to go something like “Gee, that’s too bad.  It’s so painful.  This isn’t really love, it’s limerence.  It’s nothing to be ashamed of, but it is a place you [...]

How do you know when you are in love?

Lonesome Loser | April 21, 2009

Great question! Not an easy one to answer. I’m working on an online quiz for love vs. crush, but it’s still in development. Scientifically, there is no clear or universally accepted definition for being in love.  However, there is a universally observable phenomenon that is variously known as a crush, infatuation, being in love, romantic [...]

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Please feel free to contact me at LONESOME LOSER*, I'd love to hear from you. I will make every effort to answer each email.

*This moniker sounds considerably more pathetic than I actually feel, but I just couldn't resist the tongue-in-cheek description.